thejunglenook:

khaleesri:

"no homo" I whisper as I look at my garden of pea plants. The progeny had expressed a 1:2:1 ratio of phenotypes. I am Gregor Mendel. 

This joke is lethal

(via guyfierithirdandfinalantichrist)

arcanebrain:

sirdigbey:

sockathans:

jokes about communism aren’t funny unless you share them with everyone

Jokes about communism aren’t funny because they’re basically classless.

Jokes about communism are funny in theory, but not in practice.

(via guyfierithirdandfinalantichrist)

quingly-kipling:

politicalhexkitten:

Tbh money would solve all of my problems right now like I could move out and pay for school and take care of my mental health and overall I would just be happy and in a better place so I get really annoyed when people are like “money can’t make you happy” uh you obviously never experienced financial instability and dependence so please shut the fuck up you pretentious shit.

exactly

(via fuckyeahloldemort)

uno-flatu:

If only every concept was explained with a Disney reference, I’d be doing even better in law school.

uno-flatu:

If only every concept was explained with a Disney reference, I’d be doing even better in law school.

(via joshpeck)

bringithmebooks:

Me running away from reality.

(via raspookei)

rexuality:

but how do you convince little kids to wear clever costumes they won’t appreciate?

"mommy can i be batman?"
"no you and your brother are going as van gogh and the starry night painting, it’ll be so hilarious and witty"
"i want to be batman though"
"shhhhh mommy needs more followers on pinterest"

(via guyfierithirdandfinalantichrist)

gluttonforpunsihment:

particularscarf:

search-the-castle:

quadrants:

nitwitsandthingamabobs:

shinichiwinchester:

lonely—mountain:

ridiculousinpiccadilly:

gallifrey-feels:

lizrrd-queen:

satanslittlebuttercup:

*nearby lesbian laughter*

*muffled asexual snickering*

*conflicted pansexual noises*

*moderately panicked bisexual muttering*

HETEROSEXUAL SCREAMING IN ANGUISH


Laughter from anyone who realises condoms are not the only form of birth control.

Louder laughter from those that remember that STDs and STIs are an actual thing that happen whether one is on the pill or not.

Laughter stops as people remember that STDs and STIs are an actual thing that happen whether one is on the pill or not.

Literally everyone, regardless of orientation, mutters awkwardly and shuffles away as they remember that STDs and STIs are an actual thing that can happen to anyone who is sexually active, and not just heterosexual people.

*asexual snickering increases in volume*

gluttonforpunsihment:

particularscarf:

search-the-castle:

quadrants:

nitwitsandthingamabobs:

shinichiwinchester:

lonely—mountain:

ridiculousinpiccadilly:

gallifrey-feels:

lizrrd-queen:

satanslittlebuttercup:

*nearby lesbian laughter*

*muffled asexual snickering*

*conflicted pansexual noises*

*moderately panicked bisexual muttering*

HETEROSEXUAL SCREAMING IN ANGUISH

Laughter from anyone who realises condoms are not the only form of birth control.

Louder laughter from those that remember that STDs and STIs are an actual thing that happen whether one is on the pill or not.

Laughter stops as people remember that STDs and STIs are an actual thing that happen whether one is on the pill or not.

Literally everyone, regardless of orientation, mutters awkwardly and shuffles away as they remember that STDs and STIs are an actual thing that can happen to anyone who is sexually active, and not just heterosexual people.

*asexual snickering increases in volume*

(via guyfierithirdandfinalantichrist)

adventuresofpeanut:

Some more flattering angles.

(via yongmuney)

mydogsnokes:

o yea the 90s. the 90s were great. fuckin sick. raw as hell. learning how to speak. crying for no reason. shitting in my diaper

(via textpostsandcats)

stoned-levi:

stoned-levi:

There’s nothing wrong with girls who do a lot to maintain their appearance and there’s nothing wrong with girls who do very little to maintain their appearance but there’s something extremely fucking wrong with girls who think it’s okay to judge girls for doing either or. Shut your crusty ass up for 10 seconds and let a bitch live.

oh so y’all don’t reblog my funny posts but THIS gets ya clappin

(via joshpeck)